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reflects @

and here i go reflecting.

like many other male counterpart out there.
im not good at communicating my feelings, or rather how to protray them.
and its pretty funny.
those girlies i missed so much. and yet i wana skip that dbl O outing.
those sox girls i used to hang out with, and yet i skipped those outings.
even yongkun (who is in army) and jony (who came back from indonesia) made efforts to ask me out. and yet i rejected them.

i always told myself to hold those special to me close to my heart.
and yet at the other end im isolating myself from them.

people tell me after i got my lisence i became more materialistic.
and HELL YEAH i am.
im taught to be materialistic.
its a dog eat dog world.
after having my lisence, i start to recieve wierd msges, and letters.
it simple. u have a lisence. u drive. u fetch .u become a fucking dog.
LOOK. i dun mind fetching people or anyone who are ON THE WAY.
but dun expect me to go from east area to town just to pick someone up.
and YES.
if i do buy a car.
its going to be a fucking 2 seater.
so people can fucking watch me drive ALONE.
with my BAG on the seat beside me.

am i really that easy to be made use of?
i have to thank ting and raine , to some extent on helping me
i really enjoyed hanging out with friends at night.
but sometimes the thought of driving around makes me sick.

i love to drive. its true.
but not with blasting speakers. undecisive passgers who do not know the way.
its make me wana throw everyone out of my car.
whatever it is.
ii have changed.

his footsteps