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faith @

ive seen too many broken relationships.
and experienced one 3 years ago.

many due to mismatch of characters
others due to not understanding each other.
unwilling to compromise, unwilling to give up.

i admit, i am very much afriad.
and very much lucky.
kaiqi, this very special girl in my life.
she will always be. ever since it started.

we've not known each other for long, but we felt we've know for years.
each time we have mis-understanding or conflicts, we will talk it out.
and we always ended up giving into each other.
and finding out how much more we loved each other.

i dont know how more must i express myself to her.
even words cant put down how i feel.

2 more months and ill be leaving for hongkong,
leaving my lil silly dodo behind.
3 months isnt a long time, neither its a short time.
i told her how i felt,
but whenever im with her, i dont feel that way.

i may send letters,
i may send emails.
i may send presents,
but will i be able to send my love?
and will you be able to feel it?

my love.
2 more months more
some part of me tells, me not to go,
maybe our relationship isnt that concrete yet.
yet some part of me tells me to.
for our love will be able to overcome distance and time.

its really hard.
espically for me when im alone.
all the negative thoughts will flow.
i have complete confidence and faith in our love.
but i am never complacent.
i guess i really dont want you to leave me nor i wana let go.

if you really have to.
put yourself before me.
like ive always told you to.

if you think someone's better than me, go
if you think you will be happier with that someone, go.
for all i want is just you to be happy.
just tell me "i dont love you anymore and i want to give up "
"i love you, i dont want to give up"
and
if that someone isnt what you think,
if that you feel you are not how happy you tot.
i will still love you. always behind you.
but i wont be together with you.

after i return, will we drift apart?
or will we ended up knowing how deep we have fallen?
maybe like what you said, you may just feel the same when cindy left.
but somehow i dont feel that way.
i dont know, only time will tell.

this might just be a random post,
or will be an important one.
hopefully one day,
when this post is being read.
our heart still beats together as one.

i stopped loving myself ever since the day i started loving you.
i dont mind falling, i dont mind getting hurt.
what matters the most to me, is you.

be true to yourself, and lead a happy life.

thanks for making me believe.
thanks for coming into my life.
thanks for letting me love you.
and thanks for bringing me back to life.
my twinnie. my silly dodo. my love. my girl. my girlfriend. my princess.
my everything.

Khoo Kai Qi.
I Love You.

his footsteps